Sibling Fighting

Hey mommas,

Anyone else feel like all this extra time at home has left your kids arguing all the time? How do you handle it???

yes!!! It’s so difficult. I feel bad for them and annoyed at them at the same time!

I try to remind myself that this is how they learn conflict resolution-I try as hard as I can to stay out of their arguments and let them work it out-mostly because my mom always took my brother’s side growing up, so I don’t want mot be “that mom” lol

Wow. Two months at home was intense. I started noticing behaviors that weren’t there before and yes my kids were fighting A LOT. I mostly noticed how my two older kid’s attitude changed towards their little brother. They were pushing him away more and blaming things on him - he’s three! So I quickly realized I had to put a stop to it!
I worked out a very simple “points chart” which included tasks like: doing a puzzle with your brother, reading him a story, helping him tidy up… I also added a few household chores for 10 points each (those were to help me out!!) - but they got more points for doing activities with their little brother. It changed the entire dynamic between them and the house was a lot more calm - the prize of course was TV - so that was also a plus, they were watching a bit less. It lasted about two weeks and then I had to get creative and switch it up. But the main idea - promoting kindness towards each other. No kindness = no TV!!

Hope this helps! Happy to share my chart if you’d like as well!

I would love to see the chart :smile:

Being at home has definitely brought out some interesting behaviors. I’m curious what other “prizes” appealed to your kids. We’ve tried the TV / devices but after a while that too lost it’s shine.

Love this idea! Totally agree that sometimes we just need to actively make a change to turn around the whole dynamic. :blush: I once spoke with a behaviorist who talked about rewards for very small achievements and then grow from there…I actually gave my kids quarters for behaviors I wanted to see…like independent playing, chores, and reading (cause unfortunately my kids really don’t enjoy reading)

Creativity is key!